44 Things You Don’t Know About Me

A friend of mine (Debbie) recently posted this on her blog, and I thought it sounded like fun so decided to have a go at it myself. Here are my answers:

Do you like blue cheese? No, not at all. Being lactose-intolerant, I’m not a big cheese eater anyway, but I do like warm goat’s cheese!

Last concert? Oh wow… I think it was a free concert that we went to in Jersey, Channel Islands. We saw The Commitments, Dannii Minogue, and Big Brovaz.

Do you own a gun? We have Nerf guns and a BB pistol if they count?

What is your favorite flavor of ice cream? All of them. I love ice cream.

Do you get nervous before Doctor visits? Depends why I’m visiting! But generally, no.

What do you think of hot dogs? I try not to think about what they’re made of while I’m eating them.

Favorite movie? Bad Boys

13139215_550594405118860_6186783307686865254_nWhat do you prefer to drink in the morning? Tea. Always tea. I get sad when my mug is empty!

Do you do push ups? Urgh. When my kick-boxing instructor makes me.

What’s your favorite piece of Jewelry? I have four – my eternity, engagement and wedding rings, given to me by my husband obviously. And a silver Omani coffee pot necklace that my mum and dad gave to me when we lived out in Oman.

Favorite hobby? Reading or watching movies.

Do you have A.D.D.? No, but I do get distracted easily, and I’m very fidgety. I can’t sit still and talk a lot. And I have to be doing something with my hands at all times.

What’s the one thing you dislike about yourself? Probably the lack of wiring between my mouth and my brain. I’ve got myself into a lot of trouble for talking when I should just be quiet!

What is your pet’s name? Dog: Leela. Cats: Nibbler, Kif & Zapp. (Futurama theme!) Box turtle: Freda (despite it being male) and Hamster: Jessie Mk II

Name three thoughts at this moment. 1. I should really get on and do some housework. 2. I need a cup of tea. 3. I should probably do some marketing today.

Name 4 drinks you drink on regularly? Lime squash, tea (obviously), Coke and water – note the lack of alcohol! I do drink, but not as often as people tend to think.

Current worries? A distinct lack of money to do anything with. And possibly the American election. Donald Trump is a very scary prospect.

Current annoyance right now? Lack of money!!

Favorite place to be? Home

How do you bring in the New Year? I usually fall asleep before it chimes in!

Where would you like to go? Ireland, Nepal and Hawaiihawaii.jpg

Favorite TV show? Too many to list! I love a good murder-mystery, and am a big Hawaii Five-O fan.
Do you own slippers? Yes. Leopard-print ballet pumps.

What color shirt are you wearing right now? Burnt orange

Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? No – too sweaty.

Can you whistle? Yes, but only when calling the dog. Or children.

What are your favorite color? Black, turquoise and purple.

Would you be a pirate? Yes, but only if it’s Pirates of the Caribbean style.

What songs do you sing in the shower? Whatever is going around my head.

Favorite girl’s name? Rebecca

Favorite boy’s name? William

What’s in your pocket right now? Tissues

Last thing/person that made you laugh? Trainwreck – watched it last night.

Best toy as a child? Stuffed Hello Kitty toy, which I still have.

Worst pain you ever had? Gall bladder – beats childbirth hands down!

Where would you love to live? In the middle of nowhere, surrounded by fields, forests and a river.

How many TV’s do you have? 2

Who is your loudest friend? I think I’m the loudest out of all of us, but probably Dee.

How many dogs do you have? Onecountry affairs.jpg

Does someone trust you? I’m hoping my children and husband do!

What book are you reading at the moment? CountryAffairs by Zara Stoneley – it’s very good, but taken me a while to get into.

What’s your favorite candy? Haribo or Milkybar

What’s your favorite team? Don’t have one – I tend to watch horse sports rather than team sports. But I’ll watch the England rugby team.

Favorite month? June – it’s my birthday month.

 

Re-release: Four Letter Words #Erotica #Contemporary #Romance

FourLetterWordsbyCharlotteHoward-smbanner

Four Letter Words Blurb:

Paige Holmes has made her choice. But as she begins to get her life back on track, she also starts to question her decision.

Then, the letters arrive. When Paige finds herself in trouble once again, she must decide who she can trust.

Will she go back to the one she denied, or will she stand by her choice?

Love and lust are, after all, both Four Letter Words.

FourLetterWordsbyCharlotteHoward-1800HR

Excerpt from Chapter One:

Laying my head back against the black leather seats of the Jag and gazing ahead, I lifted a finger and touched my lips that were swollen from his kiss. The weariness of the past few weeks was beginning to take over, weighing on my eyelids as they began to droop. I should have been reassured by the man sitting next to me.

I shifted in my seat so I could watch him as he drove on. He was a force that even nature had no hold over. There was an urge to reach out and cling to his broad bicep, a need to feel the security of his physical strength, aching somewhere deep inside of me.

We didn’t speak as he pressed all his weight onto the accelerator, urging the car until it was over the speed limit. I half expected the shine of blue lights to fill the inside of the car, with sirens blaring around us. But they didn’t. Of course they didn’t. Even if a marked car was to pass, I doubted Vance Ellery would slow down, and I had even less that the police would attempt to pull him over. I suspected that the personal phone number of every single high-ranking officer in the country, was tucked away in a neat Rolodex on Vance’s desk or even stored in the memory bank of his mobile phone for easy access.

The silence should have been soothing. I should have been able to let my lashes flutter against my cheeks, and slip into a relaxing slumber. Instead the lack of conversation added to the tension that built behind my eyes. I closed them, hoping that soon I would drift off into a deep sleep, where I would be surrounded by falling flowers, rainbows, and sunlight. Ha! If only I was deserving of such luck. There were no pleasant dreams awaiting me after the sandman visited. Only nightmares wanted to be part of my night. They tormented me, bringing memories that I’d tried to bury and forget. They hounded the darkness, giving me nothing but misery and pain and suffering. It was as though all my sins from a previous life had been rolled over into this one.

If the visions of his face, the sound of his voice had been the only elements of my slumber, then I might have been willing to slip away and let the desperation of rest take me to the shadowed places I dreaded. My soul was destined for torture though. I was to be punished for his crime.

The mere suggestion of sleep forced my blood to pulsate until it was the only thing I could hear, throbbing in my temples. The searing pain of anxiety and panic stabbed at my chest, pins pricking my skin, as I let my eyelids fall. A shudder fell down my spine, waking me from the light doze I’d stumbled into.

Breathe in, breathe out. In with the good, out with the bad. In through the nose, out through the mouth. Breathe in, breathe out. A mantra, taught to me by a yoga instructor years before hell had entered my life, repeated over and over in my mind. I inhaled the cool air through my nasal passages, allowing it to slip down into my pain-filled lungs, exhaling all the bad out of my mouth in a gigantic whoosh.

Ahead, the roads were empty, weaving out of the village and headed towards Richart Courts, the hotel that was to be my sanctuary for the next couple of days before I had to face the next challenge. New York City.

How anyone could expect me to go back there was beyond belief. The only logical explanation for their plans for my future was that facing New York was the lesser of the two evils that haunted me, threatening to rip away the seams that had begun to fray around my already tattered edges.

Pre-Order on Kindle (UK & US), Apple, Kobo, Nook, and Smashwords: Tirgearr Publishing

Four Letter Words is the second, and final, part to Paige’s story. The first part, Seven Dirty Words can be bought here.

Tea, chocolate and a sex ban

Having my gallbladder removed is officially worse than having a hysterectomy.

After my hysterectomy, it took 6 weeks to start feeling human, and 6 months to be anywhere near to fully-recovered. The sex ban was awful. I had to have a doctor give us the okay before we could do any more than kiss. That was about 10 weeks. It’s been 2 weeks since I had my gallbladder removed, and it is definitely worse than all of that. Why? Because I can’t fricking well eat what I want.

My life revolves around tea, food and sex. (Okay it actually revolves around my children, but this is a writer blog post, not a Mummy one.) I can’t do anything, I can’t function at all until I’ve had my morning cup of tea, preferably in my red and white spotty mug – because it’s bigger than the average mug. But since having my op, anything with caffeine in it has made me ill, including tea. So I’m on decaf. Do you have any idea how pointless that shit is?!

Charlotte Howard

See? Photoshoot, and I have tea in my favourite mug.

I mean seriously. Who looked at tea, coffee and Coke and thought: “You know what would make this great? If we took out everything that’s great about it.” Fuck that shit! I want caffeine. I want in my mug, and I want it through an IV, and I want it NOW! 

What else? Oh anything with oils, fats, lactose or gluten. I’m lactose intolerant anyway, but I can usually get away with drinking normal milk when we’re out (I’m not drinking that soy crap). I tried some chocolate the other day. I can manage a couple of squares before feeling ill. I can’t eat a whole bar though. I tried to eat some Jaffa cakes too. I ate two, count them, TWO, before wanting to throw up and having serious stomach cramps. TWO!

The sex ban is truly painful, emotionally and mentally anyway. I have four holes in me – two in my rib cage, two in my abdomen, and thanks to previous surgeries and other health issues, they are taking a long time to heal. So hubby (despite being told that it’s okay) won’t touch me in case, and I quote, “I break you”.

So that’s no tea, no sex, and no chocolate. At least after my hysterectomy I could eat chocolate and Jaffa cakes, and drink mug of tea after mug of tea.

Re-released on 3rd June: SEVEN DIRTY WORD

Being re-released on 3rd June, available for pre-order now: SEVEN DIRTY WORDS

Seven_Dirty_Words_by_Charlotte_Howard_1800HR

Seven Dirty Words has a new home! Now under Tirgearr Publishing, Seven Dirty Words is being re-released on 3rd June (my birthday!) with a new cover and new edits.

Paige Holmes hides herself in a masculine world in a desperate attempt to remain safe.

Just as she is ready to face her fears and her past, she finds herself torn between Matt Jackson and Vance Ellery: handsome, rich, and safe – or handsome, rich, and dangerous?

Which will she choose?

The one who appears to be the most perfect, or the one who makes her use all Seven Dirty Words?

http://goo.gl/Pkq8QG

Extract from Four Letter Words

Read Seven Dirty Words? Continue Paige’s story with…

Four Letter Words

FLW2

Nightmares teased and taunted me that night. Great hulking beasts tore away at my skin. Their gnarled fingers with long, scratching talons, tore at my flesh. I tried to scream, but they had stolen my voice. Breathless, I struggled onward, down the twisting path of infinite darkness. Cackles and howls surrounded me, flooding my senses. I tripped over my own confusion. Even on this one road, with no other way to turn, I knew that I was lost. Everything was lost.

  I scrambled on, clawing my way up the path. My body was heavy, forcing me down as though gravity had increased. It was impossible to stand. I dragged myself through the muck, tears streaming down my face, creating a sea beneath me. If I didn’t find my way home, I was going to drown in my own sorrow.

  The beasts continued to harangue me, spitting putrid bile in my way. I felt sick. I could taste the acrid stomach acid building in the back of my mouth. I gagged on my humility. But nothing was freed. I kept heaving, hoping to relieve some of the weight, make myself lighter so that I could stand.

  Then he was there. TDS stood in front of me. He loomed over my pitiful frame, towering as though he were twenty feet tall, a resolute statue of demanding respect. His stare as pitch black as my surroundings. Soulless.

  “Please help,” I tried to say. But my mouth wouldn’t move. “I’m sorry.” Still no words could be heard.

  An unknown force flipped me over. Invisible restraints held my wrists flat against the cold, hard ground. The ocean of tears soaked through what skin remained. Dirt crawled up my body like tiny insects. I struggled. But against what? There was nobody there.

  TDS was gone, and in his place, a callous reminder of my past. 

***

REVIEWS:

If you loved the first one then buy the second you won’t be disappointed!”  

The book pulled me in from the beginning and kept me on my toes throughout.”

A brilliantly written book is a must read…”

BUY LINKS:

Amazon UK

Amazon US

Barnes & Noble

Waterstones

Rocking Horse Publishing